It's All About Perspective | Senseless Terrorism

 I catch myself whining.
About nothing in particular.
And everything ridiculously superficial.

Traffic is too slow. Almost always. 
[ And how many idiots do have drivers' licenses? I have lost count.]
Life is so hard because I have to cook my meals with real food. And no gluten. And no dairy.
And that's awfully expensive AND time consuming. 
Can winter PLEASE leave us? Immediately.
It's tricky to get up early. I wish I could sleep in every day.
My cell phone won't work today.
Cleaning the house is of the devil.
The kids aren't getting along. Again.
My parents live in another country and I wish they lived nearby.
Wahhh Wahhhh Wahhhh. 
Life is soooo hard.

Oh brother.

And then, I talk with a dear sister-like friend today, who just got word from her family in Iraq
that there has been ANOTHER senseless act of terrorism directly affecting her family.
A nephew murdered.
One week ago.
He was in a group of young early twenty-something men.
Terrorists stopped them.
Broke his arms and other bones in his body.
Shot him (and the others) in the back countless times.
Not once. 
But over and over again.

She tells of other news that doesn't make American television.
The news of 300 Iraqi soldiers being captured by terrorists,
taken away and all beheaded.
In the 21st century.

Terrorist bastards.

Of course this triggers massive flashbacks for my friend.
Horrific flashbacks.
Flashbacks of her own husband being murdered.
And her brother murdered, too. 

What is WRONG with our world?

So I drove away from our time this morning feeling deeply burdened for her.
And rather ashamed of how I get caught up in my own little world so often.
Not always. But often.

Hearing her news puts my ridiculous whining 
about ridiculous things into perspective.

So all day long I kept thinking of these types of questions:::
Why is my life SO easy? I mean SO EASY. Doesn't seem fair.
Why does she get socked over and over again with terrible tragedy?
Why can't her family be brought to America so she can be with her mum and siblings.
Why? Why? Why?

 And I hear on the radio the horrific statistics about sex trafficking around the world.
And here in America.
Innocent children.
And what am I doing about that? 
And that makes me immediately sick to my stomach.

And I hear about a girl being stabbed to death in her high school last week
because she turned down a prom date.

And on and on it goes.

I have SUCH an easy life.
There are people dying around the world because they believe what I believe,
but their culture and country won't allow them to practice their faith.

There are thousands of children that die every day 
because they don't have food and drinkable water.
I have more food and water than I could possibly need or want.
For a lifetime.

Here I sit in my comfy dining room.
With my little doggy in her soft round bed, sound asleep.
The temperature is perfect in our home.
Soft music playing in the background.
Sipping on ice tea.
I just spent hundreds of dollars on groceries at three different stores.
Filled the car up with gas. I have a car. Two actually. And money to fill them both up with gas.
Whenever I want.

My children are safe at school. Learning.
I'm able to flit about pretty much on my own schedule.
Yes, working hard. Very hard. Working long hours.
But doing what I love. Photography. Friendships. Church relationships. Saturday night triple dates with lifelong friends. Watching a movie in our cozy 'lower level' with Jack.
Going on family bike rides. Playing board games with Jackson.
Flea marketing with Maddie.
Trips to Canada for Spring Break.
Shouting from the roof tops that I love Jesus. At no consequence to me.
At least not yet.

And then I have the audacity to whine and moan about stupid stuff like being stuck in traffic.
Or the cost of crimini mushrooms at Whole Foods.

I don't know.

 It's just been one of those days when I needed my keyboard to be able to 
put it all down before I forget what I'm feeling. Thinking.

Just processing my friend's deep loss 
my lack of loss all at the same time.

Other friends are facing cancer. I'm not.
 Other friends have lost children and mine are 100% healthy.
Other friends have lousy marriages or way worse, have lost their husbands. 
I'm blessed to have an amazing husband who is way better at relationship that I am.
Other friends have lost jobs. And I have the luxury of a growing business, 
doing what I love, on my terms and my schedule.
Other friends will struggle through Mother's Day in a couple weeks 
because their mother has passed. 
I still have my mom.

You get the idea.

I just don't know.

Feeling sad for the hardships of dear friends,
especially this sister-friend who has lost another loved one at the 
hands of senseless terrorism.

As I head to bed tonight, 
I'm asking God to not let me slip back into
my own little easy world.
I want to live a life that matters. 
For Christ.
I want to live a life that shares and gives and encourages and offers Hope
to the hurting around me. 

Grateful tonight for all that I have, and the ease in which I live.

And simultaneously DEEPLY saddened tonight for all that my friend doesn't have, 
and the difficulty in which she lives.

Oh how I wish I could wipe away her tears and take away this loss.
But I can't.
But I can pray.
 Praying God's unexplainable Peace over her tonight. 
Praying that the flashbacks cease.
Praying that she'll be able to sleep tonight.

And in the meantime, 
I'm begging God to help me keep His perspective on all this. 
When it doesn't seem fair. 
And when it doesn't make sense.
But the wrongs will some day be made right.
And He will wipe all the tears away. Some day.
And tonight, I cling to Him. 

He is my Light 
my Hope 
my Rock.


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